I am in a great distress. My 2000 words assignment is due this Monday and I have never ever done a research essay in my entire life and 2ooo words is alot for a biomedicine student like me. I know it is not a big deal for an arts students.
I really enjoyed the subject but im literally suffering in the assessment. I'm doing this subject for the sake of knowledge, not credits. The essay weighs 50% for the entire assessment. I'm so scared and lost.. Oh God, please please give me strength. Don't let me despair from your mercy. I seriously dont know what I should do and who I should turn to.
I know that I am not articulate and I dont have the coherency in writing. But please make it easy for me Oh Allah! Nothing is easy except that You made it easy..
I am literally suffocating to do this assignment. I keep trying to write but I lost my thoughts. Deep inside I know there is relief after every hardship. I'm in desperate need of Your help Oh Allah! Please help me, your humble servant who needs You.
I will keep trying and will never give up. But give me strength to go through this test with patience Ya Raheem!
Ya Fattah! Iftah li Qalbi Ya Allah!
Ya Aziz! Strengthen me Ya Allah!
Now
I need Motivation
I need Strength
I need Assistance
I need a Peace of Mind
I need Comfort
I need to Cry...
Oh Allah, I need You..
Btw, when I was sitting in the ballieu library today, a chinese man approached me and asked: Do you know if the prayer room has a copy of the Quran?
I answered: No, but we have many copies in our Prayer Space in Pelham Street.
So I deciced to bring him all the way to Pelham street which is approximately 7mins walk from our current location and depends of the traffic.
The Prayer Space is off-campus but thank God we still have a space to pray. It is essential because we pray 5 times a day, not once a week. And before our prayer, we have to purify ourselves by washing some parts of our body including the feet. So it is very inconvenience for us to purify ourselves in the public toilets.
Along the way I asked him why did he need the Quran for. Apparently he needed for his research in regards to intercultural communication between malay speakers and something I cant remember. He came from Malaysia so he has friends who are Muslims.
I told him of the importance of looking for authentic sources rather than just randomly by any books in Islam in random bookshops. I told him of the complexity of Arabic which is to be understood in the context rather than just merely translate. He seemed to understand and was very grateful Alhamdulillah. May Allah guide him to the truth.
So yeah I felt a little bit uncomfortable that I was the one who brought him all the way to the prayer space. I thought of 'passing him' to a brother so that he cud show the guy how to purify ourselves, how do we pray etc. But there were no brothers in the Bros section because the prayer time is in an hour. He also realized that the Musallah(Prayer Space)is pretty far from the campus.
When I brought him to the brothers section, he asked me if he has to remove his shoes. I was about to laugh because I did it unconsciously and forgot to tell him. Luckily he noticed that I took off my shoes before entering. and gave him a copy of THE NOBLE QURAN with summarized interpretation by Darussalam Publishing.
It is very pleasing to see that they are people who are interested to know about Islam as such in a panel discussion we had last two weeks during the Islamic Awareness Week where we had 2 speakers, Bro Wasseem and Bro Yassir to talk about the Universality of Islam and The Misconceptions in Islam followed by Question & Answer Session. The discussions were very interesting when some atheist asked some questions about verses in the Quran which seems 'contradicting' to the teachings of Islam. such as Surah anNisaa : 34
Later he found out that he got himself a distorted version of the Quran interpreted by a Jewish Scholar which is pretty awkward. I wonder why....
Some of the distortions is the translation of Sura As-Saff which was translated as The Hordes rather than the Ranks.
May Allah guide all of us to the straight path inshaAllah.
=D
This was the topic discussed in our last ever lecture today. Overall, the subject was intellectually stimulating and very informative. I have learned to know more about the world rather than just stuck in the lab dealing with the micro organisms.
I have learned a lot of things which makes me wonder what is goin on in the world we live in?
Why are these happening?
Anyways, yeah th elast lecture was pretty draining coz for some reason I was very sleepy and fatigue so I was not able to concentrate. But there is one point at least that I have learned. When the media says 'Islam and the West' it is VERY GENERIC..
Think about it..
When you say Islam, what aspects of Islam? Which theological group in Islam are you referring to? Which ethnicity? which sects? and mind you that there are A LOT of different theological group amongst the Muslims.. The liberals, Sufis, Shias, Sunnis, Ismailis, Mu'tazilites, Ahmadis, Duruz, Alavis, The fundamentalists, Talibans? The Arabs? Afghans? Asians? etc.. Soooooo which sect of Muslim are you trying to talk about?
And when you say 'The West'..
What aspects of the west are you referring to? Economics? politics? Societies?Education? Monarchy System? if so, which society? Which theological groups? Socialists? Marxist? Communists? Fascists?
Therefore, next when you speak about Islam and the West, do specify which you are referring to so that you do not generalize and say that ALL Muslims are bad or EVERYTHING from the West are not Islamic thus has to be eliminated or despised..
A reminder for myself and for everyone..
Peace Out
I am reading a book titles
My Journey Behind The Veil by Kay Rasool.
It is based on the acclaimed documentary on ABC
My Journey, My Islam.
It is indeed a very interesting book which the writer, Kay Rasool interviews Muslim Women of different cultures and background. How they grew up wearing a veil, when they started wearing it, were they forced or was it their choice, who influenced them to wear it, what does it symbolize to them etc..
Im half-way reading this book. It is one of the MUST READ book I would say.
Some interviews captured my attention and trembled my heart. I have such a respect to those who really understand what they are doing and able to explain to others what they truly and proudly believed in. It is very interesting indeed.
When I read this book, I have come to understand that one can never be forced to do something without explain to them the wisdom and essence of why they do certain things. It is very wrong to say:
You have to do this because I told you to do so.
InshaAllah I will quote some interviews when I have finished reading them.
Salams people,
How r u guys feeling? I felt really awful today as I did a detrimental mistake yesterday... I am in no peace right now. I feel so guilty yet it’s really hard to say sorry. You know sometimes you are too ego that you hurt others without thinking and you thought it was only a joke?
Yeah I cant get over it still and I cant believe how sometimes I could be so mean and offensive that I hurt people and you know that the mistake you make is detrimental? There is no turning back now. It has always been with guys. I have been repeating the same mistake over and over again and not learning from it. Sometimes I show no mercy towards guys which is very wrong thing to do. I need to learn how to respect them and be kind to them. Not insult and subjugate them. Astaghfirullah!! God!! Please Forgive me! Give me the opportunity to ask forgiveness to whomever I’m wronged to before I leave this World! Amin.
From high school, I used to tease guys alot.. I mean ALOT.. especially the quiet ones. I don’t know why but I really enjoyed it. Im quite childish at times and I did it unconsciously. This is what happens when all of your friends you hang out with in the community are underage.
But thank God. Now Ive got some older age friends although we are acting immaturely at times. To them I have learnt to express my feelings, thoughts, opinions and ideas (parallelism). It is not easy for me to actually express myself in any form because I am quite reserved at times. I am trying to exercise my ability to express through speech and writing although I do mumble sometimes LOL. But the thing is that I can’t talk on the phone for even 5mins and tell my whole life story. I have to talk face to face which means that I do talk to sisters, not brothers =D. I just realised that whatever happens in the world makes perfect sense. You just have to think a little deeply to make sense out of it.
Pause and Ponder.. InshaAllah you’ll find the way out =D
Credits to Awesome ASH MashaAllah!
Credits to Amira Salma Haruwarta.. =D
Ingredients
400g Dark Cooking Chocolate
400g Brown Sugar
280g Butter
170g Plain Flour
2 Egg Yolk
4 Eggs
1 tsp Vanilla Essence
Methods
Preheat oven to 170C
1. Chop Chocolate and Butter
2.Double Boil Chocolate and Butter till melt
3. Meanwhile, prepare baking tray (rectangular) and grease paper
4. Pour Chocolate mix into a larger bowl
5. Add sugar and mix
6. Add vanilla essence/powder
7. Add eggs one by one and mix
8. Add egg yolk one by one
9. Add Flour and fold mixture.
Bake for approximately 45min
PS: Good Luck Trying and Sorry that Im not very good in giving instructions. =P
ADIOS, SALAM Alaykum =D
Given by My beloved Aunt Rosela Sa'ad =D
Salams,
I have been working on my final assignment which weighs 50% of the assessment. I chose the topic of The decline of Women’s rights in the Muslim World. Its pretty interesting but I’m pretty scattered right now Academically, emotionally, mentally and everything. There is something wrong with me but I don’t really know what it is. I keep having certain ’nightmares’ which make me kinda distracted and disturbed.
So I have started researching about Women’s Rights in Islam since yesterday and Ive been pretty unproductive today coz I was just watching videos by Dr ZAkir Naik. Another Prominent figure in Islam. MashaAllah he is a specialized doctor as well as a well-known Da’ie (A caller to the truth). You guys can research more about him on the internet. I really admire his work for Islam. MashaAllah Allah has given him the power of memory that he memorized the whole Quran and its INTERPRETATION word by word and the number of the verses as well as the page number. He was inspired by Sheikh Ahmad Deedat who was also an expert in comparative studies. They don’t only truly understand the Quran but other religious scriptures in detail as well! And they are steadfast with their religion.
Unlike me, I’m taking Islam in the Modern World and Arabic in Melbourne university. And learning Islam in a western country unlike the way we learn Islamic Studies in the Middle-East or Asia. It’s waaaay tooooo different. Most of the time very liberal and at the same time ‘logical’ thats why people agreed. Sometimes I did fell into the pit hole and got sooo confused. Sometimes I thought that i was being BRAINWASHED to think how they want me to think. I have to go back to all authentic sources on Islam as I know that reading the books in the libraries about Islam will make me more confused than ever. I have to go back to islamqa.com (if im not mistaken) recommended by knowledgeable scholars in Australia whom I studying with and it is very helpful as I have not been to any halaqas nor usrahs nor kuliahs in uni since Ramadhan and I don’t know why. Things happened. Yeah seems like Im the bad one huh.. Yeah I feel so distant and empty now I really need to go back to my Ramadhan mode. It was so beautiful.. I need to be consistent in my Ebaadah! Oh Allah! Please make it easy for me!
SO then I was browsing ZAkir Naik’s videos. And I saw his son’s giving lectures as well during the international peace conference 2009 in India. It was a massive event! . I think he is around 14yrs old MashaAllah and he is a reflection of his father. There are videos of his little daughters as well singing nasheeds by zain bikha and dawud wharnsby ali. MashaAllah the whole family is trained to be the asset of the Ummah.
But again you can never please everyone. Some thoughtless people were claiming that zakir naik is ‘abusing’ his children and trying to ‘sell’ his family. HELLLOOOOOO????
How is he abusing his children? I don’t get these people man! I don’t understand these people who made ridiculous comments, have they ever organized anything which call people towards islam and spread the universal truth? Like seriously, it is very hard indeed to organize such religious event and it is really hard to get people attend to those events. And from what I have seen, there were thousands of people who attended that conference be it Muslims or Non-Muslims.
And how many youth are deviated, corrupted and misled because their parents are too busy in search for materials and forget their responsibility as parents?
For me, Dr Zakir Naik, knowing that he is busy with spreading the truth all around the world, he actually brings his children so that they understand and being exposed to the work of da’wah because it is an obligation of every Muslim. And the responsibility that a person withhold is greater than a normal Muslim who just stays at home and worships Allah because a Da’ie holds the responsibility so that he is OBLIGED to do what he has called people to do and if he doesn’t, he will be first to be punished in the hereafter in the Hellfire. BUT if he spreads the knowledge and truth to thousands of people and every single one of them is practicing what he has preached, and Allah will reward him for every single being who implemented that deed and the reward continues even after he dies so as long as there is someone who still practices the knowledge. MashaALLAH!
That exposure to be in public, speaking about the absolute truth since childhood is absolutely amazing! I didn’t have that much public exposure and now I’m so reserved and not confident with whatever I am doing. I hesitate to talk about Islam to others. I’m amazed by the Christian youth who open up booth everyday infront of the library to preach their religion. Why cant Muslim youth do that?? A slap on my face.
So, to conclude, it is very incompetent of any of us to criticize and cowardly make ridiculous comments on youtube about people who are making extensive efforts to spread the message of Islam while we are just sitting at home in front of computer checking on other people on facebook. Especially that they are the prominent Scholars of Islam that you are complaining about. They are people of knowledge and more beloved to Allah hence should be respected. It is as if you are digging your own grave. If you do have any disagreement with whatever they said, I am sure most scholars nowadays have forums which you can ask questions and clarify your doubts. Scholars nowadays are updated with the modern technologies so InshaAllah they will definitely get back to you.
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, I’m firstly reminding myself and all of you guys not to make comments out of ignorance and stupidity on random places without firstly refer back to the authentic sources, The Quran and The Sunnah and accusing the scholars for their stance.
Peace Out,
Umairah
I don’t think anyone will read this entry anyway coz i haven’t been updated them for aaaages.. So I will just whatever im thinking without even re reading it. This is my weakness actually. I can never be bothered re-reading and rechecking things that i wrote. Be it in the exams, assignments, statements etc. This is a really bad habit. And sometimes I don’t think before I speak and people sometimes feel offended.
Back to the topic of fitting myself into a group, there are 2 groups that I’m currently often dealing with. One is a leisure and one is a prerequisite.
One group im involved in is SALP (Student Ambassador Leadership Program) in Melbourne University where we are assigned into groups of 3-7 and we have to construct a community based project on our common interest. Our group is called ALG 14 (Action Learning Group 14) an dit consists of 6 members initially but we recently an additional member so it makes up 7.
So after a series of meetings, we decided to construct a project which promotes healthy eating in kids. We initially thought that its going to be quite easy. We collaborate with Ardoch youth foundation and they referred us to Sunshine Kindergaten. I really enjoyed playing with kids and it reminds me of my childhood. The world is so colourful and fun. Nothing worries me. When you re in uni then you realized that how much you miss your children and you will silently wish that you can turn the time.
Anyways, of course, we do have disagreements at times but we managed to deal with it maturely even though I get annoyed sometimes. Like seriously, I don’t really like to be asked so many times that I have to do this and that. I know its my responsibility and I will do it. Just remind me once or twice. You don’t need to remind me EVERYTIME you see me knowing that the task is due like in 5 weeks. It simply tells me that you don’t trust me and that Im not reliable enough. Yeah I do get mood swings at time.Btw, apart from doing this project over 40 hours, we have to do 20hrs of University Service too. But I’m done with that.
Yeah sometimes I get confused between two cultures. Since I came here when I was 15( the prime age for youth) it was a major transition in my life. I have to adapt to both aussie and asian culture. Asian culture as most of u guys know, we need to be perfectionist and everything has to be in perfect order and you will be given a detailed explanation for every task that you undertake. As for aussie culture, you are given the task usually without any specifications abt how you want to do it. Its up to you as long as the outcome is satisfied. So you tend to learn how to do everything from scratch and that you can do one thing more than one way. In Asian culture, you are being told and stalk by others constantly as a consequence, yo don’t even have a space to think and your mind became lazy. That is what happening to me. But sometimes I mixed both cultures, I am lazy and I don’t like to be told what I need to do. So yeah. I would prefer mixing around with a group of various culture but we have the same mission. So that everyone will do their part without being asked to achieve our goal. Of course there are people who are lost sometimes but they will seek advice and assistance so that they know what they need to do. There is someone who overlooks but no one is a dictator.
They are the AWESOME and SUPERLICIOUS UMISes! I’ll talk more abt them in the next post inshaAllah.. =D
Salams,
The Weekend has just passed. I cant believe it is week 11! Another 1 more week we’re done for this year.. And the Battle begins.. I haven’t start any revision. Its very2 bad. Allah.. Although Im actually doin only 3 subjects.. 10 contact hours, half less than last semester because Im doing Arabic diploma alongside with my degree, I still feel that I don’t have time to revise or read.
Actually ,This Semester I have preoccupied myself with various voluntary activities. Be it from SALP University, Islamic Society, Community. I am enjoying myself so much. On the other hand, my studies were ignored. Hmm.. Im loving all my subjects except for genetics which sometimes too uncertain. But I definitely enjoy Islam in the modern world and Arabic although Im not that good at it.
Anyways, along the way I did experienced friendship, responsibilities, lethargy, annoyance, a lil bit of hatred sometimes(although Im not supposed to), disappointment, appreciation, rejection, ignorance, compliment, contentment and being reprimanded.
In life there are always things that you look for. A place for you to share you r opinions, laughter and hardship. There are places where you could only laughter but never cry on, where you could be serious but never laugh and a place where you could be serious, and laugh but never cry on.
You went to search all around you. Be it an organization, school mate, colleague, friends but you were unable to find a suitable place for you to settle. Ultimately you realized that there is something wrong somewhere. You started to question yourself. What is goin on? What is happening around the world? The world doesn’t seem friendly to me? I don’t belong anywhere..
In fact you have not asked yourself : Am I looking in the right place? Then you realized that you have to change yourself first. You have to spend time contemplating, reflecting and discovering who are you? What am I created for? What are my responsibilities? Why am I here? Why am I a human? The question goes on and on....
Suddenly you became frustrated. There’s no way out. You cant find any contentment, any solutions which will satisfy your quest. You have given up. You feel like you are useless in this world. You are not good with anything. You became depressed.. no one to turn to.. and then.. you remember one word.. Allah.....
AaaaaaChoooooo! Alhamdulillah..
My blog is pretty dusty after 7 months of being left 'hibernated'.
I have lost my words eversince. Having difficulties expressing myself in speech as well as writing.
Even at this very moment it is really hard for me to organize my mind and write this entry..
Usually, people write on their blogs what they are having a hard time. Yeah Im having an unsettle moment right now. I have not been productive at all in my studies.. A lil bit distracted. I cant afford to be distracted as my exams are around the corner.. in 2 weeks.. but yeah..
Trying very hard to regain confidence and strength to move on..
7 months have passed.. Alot of things happened.. Pleasing and Distressing.. I feel a lil bit restricted on what I want to write. It may offend some people but everyone has a right to express their opinions.
Anyways, there are things in life that u like and dislike, u love and you hate.
I have been trying to eliminate the feel of hatred from certain things which I shudnt care of.
The most sensitive issue that I despise of is that of Nationalism.. The Question of where you are from. I was never able to comprehend the need of questioning someone where they came from. I mean which country they are from. Like seriously. What can u gain from it?
Personally, I dont usually ask people where they are from unless it is necessary coz I myself dont like to be asked. Often that people who asked me are those came from overseas. I do get annoyed sometimes but I have to deal with it. I dont favour it because I felt that I was labelled into a group and I was isolated. Although I know that they do not have any bad intentions. There is no significance to it. It doesnt mean that if I am Malay, I will be sticking around malays where ever I go. It doesnt mean that I will have alot in common with them. I dont mind religious wise. As in they are labelling me as a Muslim because that is something to be proud of because it's very obvious anyway.
Anyways..
There are infact other things which concerns me but again things that i shouldn't pay attention to.. I will try to inshaAllah keep my mind and heart open to recognize and accept others differences and respect their thoughts and opinion..
Keep Smiling,
Umairah